‘Stir’ Events Advice

UPDATE: Want to know what these events are like? Check out my Stir Review. I even have a photo and video from an event I attended. –Russ

On one of my many dates – this one a few years ago – while chatting about the subject of online dating, one of my dates had a clever idea: “I want to message a bunch of people on, and invite them to a bar for a meetup. Not speed dating, just a bunch of single people getting dates.” I thought it was a great idea, but of course, neither of us ended up doing anything about it. Fortunately, we didn’t have to. View Photos of Singles at stir events Over the past couple of months, has been rolling out “Stir,” which is exactly what my date and I were brainstorming about. It’s a bunch of subscribers, all in one bar, chatting and mingling. No awkward speed-dating. It’s like going to a bar, but knowing everyone there is single. Well, almost everyone. Each subscriber can bring up to 3 guests. So, if you’re nervous to go it alone, you can spend more time complaining to your friends about your dating life. Here’s a little review of how these events work:

  • A bunch of subscribers (& their guests) at an event: could be a bar, a wine tasting, or a bowling night
  • Currently available in 20 US cities – should be nationwide by September 2012. expects to host 500,000 singles at 3,000 events over the next year.
  • Invitees for the event guest list are supposedly chosen based upon compatibility algorithms that Match has been building up over the years.

Match is marketing these events pretty aggressively, too. They’ve been running ads on TV, and if you’re signed up for Match at all, chances are you’ve been getting emails from them. They’re also marketing the events right on the dashboard you see after signing in. But, the most powerful way they’re marketing this? By telling me how many women are RSVP’d for the next event in my area:

women attending the next match stir event
Whoa, that's a lot of ladies!
Wow. These are going to be big. Review these tips for making your experience a good one:

  • Don’t be afraid to go alone. You’ll force yourself to actually talk to people, rather than clinging to your friends. If you really can’t bare to try it alone, bring a single friend. Or, I guess, a single single friend. I mean, one single friend. Get it? Hopefully I don’t have to tell you why bringing an attached friend isn’t going to help you out.
  • Talk to everyone. If nobody catches your eye right away, just turn to someone of the opposite sex and strike up a conversation. What to talk about? Well, it’s easy. Talk about the cool new event. “Have you been to one of these before? How have you liked so far?” You’ll be amazed what can come from an honest conversation.
  • Be positive. Chances are, at least some of your experience with online dating has been stressful or disappointing. Well, that’s just the way dating is sometimes. Try to not have a rant about how “none of the women respond to my messages,” or “all of the guys are creepy.” If you must joke about someone you met online, try not to do it condescendingly. Any of this will just reflect poorly on your personality.
  • Make a good impression. Dress at least as well as you would for a date. Iron your clothes, take a shower, smell good, but don’t put on too much cologne.

Overall, just be constantly in action, avoid being a wallflower, be fun and in the moment. Where are these events going to be? I haven’t been able to find a list, but I know they are at least in Chicago and Pittsburgh. It would be a safe bet that they are also in San Francisco (San Jose, Oakland), New York City, Boston, Washington D.C., Miami, Atlanta, Los Angeles, Dallas, Austin, Denver, and Phoenix. Have you heard of events in your area? Tell us in the comments. If you want to stay up-to-date on Stir events in your area, sign up for But, if you want to get on the guest list to attend an event, you’ll have to subscribe, so you may as well use one of my promo codes.

Posted by: on Jul 3rd, 2012
In: Online Dating
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