’s VIP Mail, and Why You Shouldn’t Use It

You may have noticed a brand-new feature on today. It’s called “VIP mail.” Basically, it’s a “special” message that you can only send once per week. The idea being that whomever you send it to will be impressed and flattered.

Funny thing is, when you start composing a VIP mail, they show you some tips on the side for writing a great message, and one of those tips, illustrates exactly why you shouldn’t use this feature. View Photos of Singles at

If you have done your homework, and know how to send a great online dating message using conversation nuggets, you won’t have to send a “limited edition” e-mail to her to show her that you’re interested. You’re already way ahead of the pack.

And isn’t it a bit presumptuous to be that interested in a girl? I mean, even if she knows how to write a great online dating profile, you should have enough great prospects that you still want to meet her in person before you’re expressing this much interest.

So, time will tell, but I don’t see this feature as being important in your online dating arsenal. Stick with the fundamentals. Extra bells and whistles like this are just a distraction.


  • Completely agree, I hate it when dating sites add these kinds of features. They only hurt you more than they help you, by showing too much interest as you say or putting her up on a pedestal before you even know her.

    PlentyofFish has a similar thing where you can send a “rose” to a prospective date, but you are only limited to two roses per week or month (whatever it is). It’s a bit needy if you ask me, kind of like in real life, when a guy sends a girl a dozen roses before they really even know each other. It’s a bit creepy.

  • russruggles

    Hehe, that’s hilarious. I didn’t know about the PlentyofFish “rose” feature but it does sound creepy to me.

    I’ve never been one to buy flowers though. I’m reminded of a scene in The Office when Andy gives Angela a boquet of flowers – I think before a date or something – and she ungratefully remarks “now what I’m I supposed to do with these?”

    Maybe it has something to do with Love languges. Some people are “quality time,” and others are “gifts.” Though, you hardly know the girl, so it still doesn’t make sense!

  • No kidding!! How about when Match automatically flags your email as VIP to an “interested” profile and you don’t even know until it’s sent?! wish I could take it back since it’s a bit much…

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